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Listening
How do you listen to yourself and how you listen to others? This is perhaps an unfamiliar exercise, to observe the filters through which we are hearing ourselves and others. It affects how we interact with the world. I was personally confronted this weekend. My...
Where are you locked out?
Are you incapable of being with unsavoury situations? When someone yells at you, or when you are with a person who is angry, what is your automatic, instant reaction? Do you freeze and have no space for responding or taking action? This is your reptilian brain...
My Want-er is Broken
Tell me what you want, what you really REALLY want. Were the Spice Girls onto something with sticking that lyric in our heads? In my coaching practice, I have encountered women who are clear about their wants - up until a certain point. Then an event happens (like a...
There is no such thing as ‘good’ stereotypes
There is no denying I am Chinese woman. I look Chinese and because people can see I am a Chinese woman, I'm often the recipient of comments that indicate personal biases and stereotypes. For instance, when I first moved to New York, I was told by both my white and...
Getting open and honest about “open and honest” conversations
How many times have you heard about someone valuing “open and honest” conversations? Many people have touted the value of these kinds of conversations as the panacea of resolving all conflict miscommunication and misunderstandings, hurt feelings, etcetera, in both...
Ways to feel good about yourself Everyday
We all want to feel good everyday and it doesn’t always happen. Life gets serious a lot of the time and we forget the little things we can do to take care of ourselves. If we don’t take care of ourselves, we have less to give to our families, friends, jobs and...